Pupdate: Snow Dog!

Hi Folks! It's me, Bailey Bear! Have you forgotten about me already?



Well, I've been having lots of fun lately. And yesterday was super! Dad had a snow day, and Mom took a half day at work. She came home early, and we all went to my favorite place ever - the dog park! (Mom and Dad have even taken to spelling it now, because I get too excited when I hear the actual word P-A-R-K.) So we went and played a lot with some of my friends...

Here I am with my friends JR, a black Labrador Retriever, and Cello, a Beagle-Husky mix...she likes to try to bite my ears.


and this is JR's sister, Geist, a three-legged Weimaraner. Isn't she pretty? She thinks she's too good for me, though, and didn't want to play with me very much.


I love love LOVE the dog park! AND I love snow! So when Mom and Dad took my leash off, I started to run around like a crazy dog :)





After running a whole lot, I started to use my nose as a snow-plow all over the park. I shoveled the snow and had a silly white muzzle, and then all of a sudden I stopped...and started sniffing intently...wondering...



...Is it? Could it be???


It IS!!! A snow-covered tennis ball!!! WOOHOO! I so rock at this snowdog stuff :)


Once we were all done running and playing fetch, it was time to go home. It was a good thing, too, because I was so tired that I started trying to lay down in the snow! (That didn't last long, though, because my belly got too cold and wet.)

Mom and Dad and I got back home (Mom couldn't get up the driveway because of the snow, and I was a little scared)...and we finally got inside and I went and curled up in my favorite blanket and fell asleep :)



By the way, my parents have gone 30 whole days without smoking. Pretty sweet, huh? Now it's more fun than ever to give them kisses all over!

Improv Bowling...

So LOTS of you have a snow day today. Unfortunately I do not.
Some of my coworkers did not come into the office today. I did.

With a partially empty office, things get rather relaxed. It's even difficult to attempt to be productive.

And when your office is basically one long hallway on the side of a building...well, there's just TOO MUCH TEMPTATION to create your own bowling lane.

We took the remnants of a coworker's "Welcome-to-the-family prank" (we saran-wrapped his entire office) and rolled it into a rather large, lopsided ball shape.

We then took empty plastic water bottles out of our recycling bin, and thus our "pins" were created :)

What ensued this afternoon needs no photographs. Guess we're easily amused, huh?

And, FYI, today is Day 27. That will make tomorrow 4 whole weeks since Mr. P and I stopped smoking :)

So true...

Maggie commented on my last post with a link to the image below:

It's pretty true! Though in all fairness, I feel the need to come clean. I've had two slip-ups in the past three weeks. They total well under half a cigarette, but I apparently have a guilty conscience and feel the need to fess up. I know Mr. P has also had a slip (which I don't blame him for - there were incredibly extenuating circumstances that don't need to be explained on a blog).

Now, I won't say it tastes like my dog's anus because I have more respect for Bailey than that :) But it's definitely up there with licking dirty asphalt or something equally disturbing. And coughing the following day has been enough to remind me that I don't want to do it again.

What's extra weird is that I have more of a "smoker's cough" the day after a single puff than I ever had when I was up to nearly a pack a day. Just one more reason to not go back to it.

And I guess a minor setback here and there is enough to remind me that 1) this is really hard! and 2) I'm glad I've been strong enough to not give in completely.

Thanks again for all your support, especially from those of you I've seen in person lately. I still have a long road ahead of me, but it's VERY COOL to know that so many people are in my corner rooting for me!

w00t!

21 days = 3 weeks smoke free!

I enjoyed a few chocolate chip cookies at work today.

Didn't get that manicure last week, but I spoiled myself with some new polish and did my own at home. I'm happy with that :)

In the words of Mr. P

"You know, the difference between Guys' Nights and Girls' Nights is that guys don't take pictures of that sh!t. We don't want evidence. And then there's you girls and it's all 'Take my picture! Take my picture!' Nope. I'm not having that."

He has a point. I'm reminded of that point every time something appears on Facebook.

Our mini-celebration

So, since Mr. P and I are 80 year-olds trapped in the bodies of 20-somethings, we bought a puzzle last night. It's a way for us to spend time together doing something, and we actually have a lot of fun doing them! It's been a while since we've done one, and we got a 1000-piece fall scene.

It's nuts. To the point of making me (slightly) crazy. But when we find a piece we're looking for, lots of high-fives ensue. Keeps us busy, though! This one will probably take some time to finish.

In case you hadn't figured it out already, Mr. P and I are dorks. Big time.

I'm sure Mr. P will do something small for himself...And I'm thinking about treating myself to a manicure this weekend :)

Anybody know what day it is?

Day 14!

That's right. As of this evening, I'm TWO WHOLE WEEKS smoke-free :)

I want to do something to celebrate. Any ideas? (One catch - it must be very inexpensive.)

WOOHOO!!!

Pretty effing proud of Mr. P and me.

Side note: The colder the air gets, the drier my skin gets. And it makes the patch all itchy and stuff. Yuck.

Haircut

So...I got my hair cut. It's shorter than it's ever been before (about chin length), and I'm not sure if I like it.

A little longer than this:


A bit less wild than this:
(no crazy bang stuff for me - ridiculous doesn't even begin to describe...)

And I'm no Geena Davis, but a bit closer (and less red):


Same old boring dark brown, but I'm toying with dyeing it again (though it took FOREVER to grow out last time). No pictures of me. I'm weirded out by that. But it'll be front and center at Saturday's wine night, for those who will be joining me.

Ugh. I can't decide. Either A) I'll grow to like it, or B) it'll grow out.

11 Down...lots to go

Today's Day 11 of not smoking.

It's also the second weekend of not smoking. That has been the most difficult part so far. Pop keeps reminding me that the first 2 weeks are the absolute worst. He's right, so far.

The hardest parts:
drinking (alcohol, coffee, etc.)
driving
after meals
work frustrations

When I actually realize how frequently these things occur, it's ridiculous! More than anything else, it's about breaking the routine. All things considered, I've done pretty well - especially since much of the above is out of my control.

Mr. P and I are talking about joining a gym, since we're saving a little money by quitting. That's another hurdle I'll have to tackle - and quite likely a much more difficult hurdle for me.

I feel like I'm turning my life in a good direction. It hasn't been long enough for me to really say that, but I'm remaining optimistic and tackling some challenges head-on.

Woot! Day 8

Day 8 of not smoking. Already through Week 1 and into Week 2.

Easier each day (except I forgot to put my patch on yesterday morning in a rush to get to work...many thanks to Mr. P for dropping one off at lunchtime).

I bet the blog posts are boring to read. But it's a way for me to hold myself accountable. Thanks for bearing with me :)

In other news, Mr. P and I went to see Slumdog Millionaire this week. I highly, highly recommend it. Unlike any move I've seen before. That's all I'll say - if you're interested, you'll either see it or find more info on your own.

Day 6, and a little history

Thanks for all the support! Each comment has added to my determination - I can't begin to explain how much it helps me!

I'm finding it helpful to talk about it all, and I've been trying to figure out why I smoke(d). It's hard to find an actual reason, which sucks. But it only fuels the fire - I don't want to do this anymore! I know about all the health risks. Who doesn't? I know people get cancer, I know people die. Carrie pointed out that "if information was the answer, it wouldn't be such a problem for people." And she's right! What I'm realizing is that quitting isn't just about the benefits of not smoking, it's also because I don't even know why I started in the first place.

So, a little history of me and smoking:

My first cigarette (pictured below - OMG so gross) was stolen from my mother when I was 10. Occasionally, I'd take a pack from her carton and it would last me months. Honestly, though, I'm pretty sure my addiction began with the first one.



My friend A and I used to head into my backyard and sneak cigarettes because we were just that cool.

I read a book in seventh grade - it's still one of my favorites - that placed importance on a box of Camel cigarettes. Thus they became my preferred brand, although I'd take whatever I could get.



I started smoking more when I hit high school. I knew a handful of places where I could buy cigarettes - at age 14 - and not have any problems. Of course, that also required being friends with driving-age people who also smoked. (Read: BAD INFLUENCES!) But even when my older friends graduated high school and left for college, I continued to smoke.



I've been a pretty heavy smoker now since I was 15...so it's been nearly 12 years. And I can honestly say I never actually liked smoking. I think it just came extra easy to me - I never had the bad reaction that so many people have the first time they smoke. I don't even remember a time when I didn't inhale.

I do know that I always tried to keep it out of other peoples' faces. I would walk away from group settings for my fix, because it wasn't about other people. It was about me and my cravings.

I never liked leaving the group. I like to think I'm stronger than my addiction. And I don't want to be associated with it anymore.

Day 5 :)

First of all, this is not a New Year's Resolution. Those things put so much unnecessary pressure on a person, and they're designed to fail! I mean, you get silly drunk one night, wake up the next day, and decide to improve something? It takes planning, people!

That said...this is day 5 of not smoking. Mr. P and I are both giving it another go. We set our date a couple months ago, knowing we needed to get through the holidays first. And we started (stopped?) on January 1. So far, so good. Until today.

I've noticed that my biggest triggers are work-related: driving to/from work, set "breaks" with my office smoker-buddy, etc.

I really want to quit.

I don't want my clothes/hair/breath/etc. to smell like a cigarette anymore.
I don't want to feel so unhealthy anymore.
I don't want to waste money on this addiction.
I don't want to have to feel like a pariah in social situations.

I want to start over.
I want to feel better about myself.
I want to prove to myself - not anyone else - that I can do this.
I want to save the money I'm not spending and do something fun!

I'm struggling a bit, but I'm managing. I can use all the consistent encouragement I can get. This isn't just a one-day thing. Tomorrow, I'm gonna need a boost. Wednesday, another one. Next week, and after, I just need all the reminders I can get that I'm doing an awesome job. And this time around, I'm not allowed any rewards until I hit the one-month point.

I've already called Pop once today to get a little extra moral support. I'm scared of slipping up, but I'm determined. And though I might not feel it right now, down the road, it'll be much better.